As I sit here half intoxicated I feel victory in my veins. I have won against an overweight inebriated Chinese guy. Sobriety has been the deciding factor in this battle.

It started out innocently; an invitation to eat together. As typical Sichuan dishes got served, well known for it’s spiciness, slowly but surely alcohol got introduced. I drank some kind of Chinese spirit known as Baijiu (a clear liquid of over 52% alcohol) and a lot of beer. It goes without saying that I couldn’t decline as the Chinese can be very persuasive.

As I sat and listened to the conversations of which I understood nothing but a couple of words, I got fed until I could eat no more. Now what one might expect coming from a western background is not what you actually experience; Chinese drinking culture differs quite a lot from what we are used. Instead of the short meeting between mugs and accompanying cheers , it seems that in China you need to address a different person for every sip you take. Clock or counter clockwise around the table even! Tell them how happy you are to meet them, wish them and their family the best of luck or even just tell them how much you love them based on how much alcohol you’ve imbibed. Everything goes!

As time passed by people got louder and louder and I seemed to be the only person left to hold the slightest bit of clear conscience (although barely, seeing as though I have drunk quite a lot during this nice but humid evening). As a result I had to wrestle a guy to bed, clean up the broken shards of glass everywhere and then wrestle the same guy to bed several more times until he had no more energy to get up; all of this while refusing to slip in his puke of course. At the same time the young girl that runs the hostel is also drunk and there seems to be no running water.

At least there’s a cute little kitten to hold me company while I write this down. Let it be known that there is no such thing as a boring evening in China.